Thursday, December 04, 2008
Christmas In Heaven
Jingle bells, Batman smells...
Now that we've got that little round of juvenalia out of the way, let's talk turkey. Christmas turkeys. We don't normally approve of novelty songs, but we had a relatively positive response last year when we posted a few "talking" songs. These are Christmas tunes that are so horribly sentimental, so full of pathos, that they become unintentionally hilarious, and, in some ways, become great.
Seems it's the old-timey Country folks who are the worst abusers of this brand of hanky waving. Today we've got Stonewall Jackson making Santa cry, Eddie Bond "celebrates" the dearly departed at Christmas, and Charlie Louvin of The Louvin Brothers brings the syrup to the infirm at Yuletide. While all of these are horribly wrong, the worst offender is Eddie Stubbs, who talks us through a song so vile, you'll be trying to rip your ears off just to make it end. Highly recommended!
Things improve greatly tomorrow, we promise. And there's a bonus re-post at the end that should truly brighten everyone's day.
The following are sorted by degree of terrifying horribleness, from least to worst.
Fa la la...
Stonewall Jackson: Mommy, Look Santa Is Crying (mp3)
Eddie Bond: Christmas In Heaven (mp3)
Charlie Louvin: Shut In At Christmas (mp3)
Eddie Stubbs: Little Orphan Joe (mp3)
Mae West: Put The Loot In The Boot Santa (mp3)
Things get better tomorrow. 'Til then, support yr local Kleenex manufacturer.